I love the changing of the seasons. I love that just as I begin to tire of one extreme, the weather changes. I could live without late July and August ... and January through early March. But, without the extreme heat of July and August, September and October would not feel so revitalizing. Without the extreme cold of January and February, the Spring thaw would not feel so invigorating. Instead of looking back with dismay, we have something glorious to look forward to. We can delight in the activities that can only happen in July and August, knowing that relief is ahead. We can enjoy the snowstorms of the dead of winter, knowing that it won't last forever.
I love spring and fall most of all. And yet, spring and fall wouldn't be spring and fall without the summer and winter that precedes them. It's the change that I love. It's breaking out of the monotony. It's being able to see the world in a new and different way. God gave us these changes for a reason.
I think changes in our life are the same way. I've been struggling through a major change for the last year ... the adding of baby #6. I've been fighting the change. My plan was always to have 5 kids. Five seemed perfect. Five felt perfect. As soon as I heard I was expecting again my vision of the perfect family was shattered. Six is a lot. Six pushes us into weirdo land. Six will be hard.
And six has been hard. It's nothing personal against Alex. After the first four months of colic, he has been a delightful little guy. Everyone in the house adores him. But ... six is much harder. Most days I feel like I'm drowning. I can't seem to keep up with everything that I need to do. I keep looking back at my days with only five and I feel resentful. Life was so much easier then.
But, this is the life that God gave me. He didn't promise that things wouldn't be hard. He didn't promise that life would be exactly the way I pictured it. THIS is my life. I can't go back. I can only move forward. I need a change of my mindset.
Life is full of seasons. I happen to be in one of those times I could live without ... a hot July ... or a cold January. But, God reminded me this morning, that this too shall pass. Change is a part of living. We have a choice on whether we will fight or accept them. I need to look ahead to the spring and fall ahead and know that it is coming. I need to embrace these days, knowing that they will pass. I need to live each day to the fullest.